Tuesday, April 21, 2009


i was exhausted last night i passed out at 11. i stumbled home in the rain after kash took care of my ass with vegetable bean curd soup mint tea and broccoli and apples. i was a straight up mess yesterday. i don't know why that happens sometimes but andrew once said it's like a bad trip. i couldn't stop crying on the subway. it was so packed on the 4/5 train and at brooklyn bridge it was seriously like shoulder to shoulder already and then more people tried to get on the train and and i kept getting pushed and i was crying and shit and it was fucking awful. i couldn't hide from anyone cause i couldn't move so i wrapped luke's scarf around my face, the red and black striped one that i really like. then this person started saying shhh, it's okay, and i didn't know where they came from but they started taking deep breaths and it made it better, i guess. i didnt have an umbrella and i was all wet and i felt nasty. i cried the whole way home. i was kind of mortified but i couldnt help it i was having a bad trip.

what a freak, get it together


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